Kids crack me up!

Lydia (eyes are watering): Mom, I think I am allergic to diarrhea.
Mom (trying not to smile): Why do you think you are allergic? Do you have diarrhea?
Lydia: NO, but SOMEBODY does and it's making me sneeze and my eyes water!


Ethan (looking at a blemish on my chin, yes I still get them): Mom, you have a really BIG bug bite on your chin!
Lydia (whispering loudly to Ethan): That's NOT a bug bite Ethan, it's a zit....and it's been there FOREVER.